kikimay: (You Wonderful Boy)
[personal profile] kikimay
'Cause I posted this stuff on Tumblr, so anyway!

As I was looking for new posts about my favorite Gryffindor babe Harry, I bumped into a very common critique against the “Cursed Child” plot and … I kind of want to say my opinion about that?

It seems to me that many fans are upset and disappointed by the relationship between Harry and his son Albus Severus aka = “Harry sucks as a dad!”

About that, I just want to point out that:

- While I maintain my inalienable right to ignore the Cursed Child and, generally, to ignore the whole epilogue and imagine a different future for the characters

- While I firmly believe that, even in the Cursed Child, Harry is not a bad father, but a confused and overwhelmed man trying his best and failing for different reasons …

I have to say that the only thing that actually makes sense to me about Harry’s life as “mature adult” is his failure as father figure.

Don’t mistake me: Harry is my favorite character of the saga and his heart is full of love and compassion. I don’t believe it would be hard for him to love deeply and completely another human being, especially a son.

But that’s the thing: while Harry can love, he also has a lot of unresolved trauma on his back and I think that a love so overwhelming would definetely scare him.

Especially because he doesn’t know how to parent. He didn’t have any positive model during his childhood - while being constantly abused, he also witnessed the awful parenting of Vernon and Petunia towards Dudley - and later he had only tragic and/or problematic parental figures that also fucked him up.

My boy Harry would be terrified by the very idea of being a father, IMHO. And the younger the scarier, because he didn’t have the chance and the time to work on his own issues.

What do you think about that?

Let Harry go to therapy.

Date: 2017-06-16 07:53 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile]
My boy Harry would be terrified by the very idea of being a father, IMHO. And the younger the scarier, because he didn’t have the chance and the time to work on his own issues.

I think that makes a lot of sense, looking at it from that perspective.

But also reaffirms why the entirety of the epilogue is bullshit and I promptly ignore it since I don't even believe it's realistic that everyone would be married and having children because they knew they're not ready for that kind of responsibility after everything they endured and went through. Most of them had to grow up too quickly and are incredibly fucked up because of it. There is no way in hell that they would try to settle down and have families so soon after the war. One of the reasons why I pretend the epilogue never existed is because I wanted to focus on Harry and the rest of them healing, of working out those issues.

Now, I haven't touched the Cursed Child and never will for many reasons, but I'm in agreement that if his failing as a parent in that context was because of those issues then it makes sense that he would be so overwhelmed and not reacting in the right way. I mean, look at how he reacted in Order of the Phoenix. He never had a proper outlet for working through his emotions, and if he didn't properly go through therapy after the war it would explain why he wouldn't know how to deal with certain things.

I think the reason people are so angry about that and quick to call Harry a bad father is because of how it is being presented. Even with his history, Harry Potter was still a kind, generous and compassionate person despite everything he had gone through and endured, so it's impossible to even consider the notion that he would treat his own child in such a way no matter what since he knew what it was like being mistreated due to his own experiences and would never repeat that. So it seemed incredibly jarring and kind of a retcon of everything we've known of Harry's character throughout the series. And I am in agreement with many about that. Though when you look at it from the perspective that you mentioned, it gives a valid explanation.

(That shouldn't excuse his behavior, obviously. Being emotionally suppressed doesn't negate having to take responsibility of his actions, even if they are mistakes, especially since he knows what it's like to be mistreated as a child and knows how unfair it is to take out those unresolved issues on someone else, especially his own child.)

But yes. Allow Harry to go to therapy.


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